Right Choices

I have made "right choices" my entire life. I mean, I'm sure I haven't walked everything out perfectly, but I've always over-analyzed everything, talking it through until there's nothing left to say and in the end making the best possible choice out of all the options. The truth is, sometimes that is incredibly exhausting. Don't get me wrong, I have no intentions of just flying by the seat of my pants and not thinking through what I'm doing at all, but in a sense, I'd like to just live a little bit "lighter". I can honestly say I have no regrets - not even one. Maybe there are things I should regret and I don't? I don't even know what those would be though. So my question is now, how terrible would it be if I actually made a mistake? How detrimental would it be to the longevity of my life to have just lived in the moment and didn't always make a "highly educated, processed, thought-over and discussed with much wisdom decision". Sometimes I wonder if I'm so terrified of making mistakes that I always make the safest choice rather than stepping out in faith, taking a risk and actually having the possibility of things turning out incredibly amazing...or for that matter, not so great.

For instance, I'm moving to Denver and will be looking for a job in the near future. The safe, practical, "make the wisest choice" Trish wants to look for a 9-5 job as a designer or creative director, making a modest income (honestly, the jobs that make a lot I like to steer away from. I know that the salary is directly related to the expectations and I have no desire to be that tied to my job), have a retirement account, health insurance and know that I will get a steady paycheck every 2 weeks. Then there's this small side of me that says - throw out everything I've been "programmed" to think is necessary or the "grown-up" way of life and just live. Make really modest choices for housing, keep my bills to a minimum, build up a freelance clientele and work my own hours. If I want to work 4 hours today and spend the rest of the afternoon skiing, fine. If I want to sit in my pajamas and work from my living room sofa all day...I could do that. If I want to go spend a month in Italy working from the bistro on the corner, perfect. You see, the glory of my job is that it requires nothing other than a computer, software, internet, and myself. I chose this career with that very idea in mind - that it offered such flexibility. I've worked for 6 years with a great organization that has given me an incredible amount of experience and knowledge and helped build my portfolio. I've had a steady income, excellent benefits, vacation time and even ministry time, but if I wasn't on someone's "time", think about how amazing that would be?! I wouldn't need vacation days, ministry days, etc. I would be able to take off and spend a month in Africa and not have to worry about whether or not I had enough vacation days! Granted, I would have to budget for health insurance and retirement, but those things are minimal in comparison to the freedom of being my own boss and working from anywhere in the world. The major downside? I'm a people person. I would need a travel companion or a ski buddy or just someone to "debrief" with every day (I love our morning "catch-up" on Mondays). As my dad has always said - I have a lot of words, and if I don't use them up on a daily basis, they roll over...so just let me get them all out :).

Ironically, in the midst of typing this post, I got an email from a design firm in Denver requesting to meet with me. Haha! Wow...choices to make.

So....all that to say, I'm looking forward in many ways to just living in the moment a bit more and although I don't intend to throw all wisdom out the window (don't worry!), I want to just enjoy the moment a bit more...regardless of the outcome. Life is too short.